A lil' something about a rock band known as The Jesus Lizard The Jesus Lizard formed in Chicago way back in 1988 and enjoyed a rocky ride as a band through multiple break-ups and reunions. But they really rocked it best in the late nineties... ...

Former US President Bill Clinton
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The former US president Bill Clinton recently paid an unannounced visit, and you better believe that Think was there.

Our reporter caught up with the big man at one of the city's finest brothels, and here's what he had to say.

THINK: Sooo Bubba... can I call you Bubba?

CLINTON: Well, actually, I'd prefer if you'd call me Mr. Presi...

THINK: Riiight... So Bubba, what you doing here? Trying to escape the heat for all that stuff you stole from the White House back when you vacated? Did you really swipe all the W’s off the keyboards in the Whitehouse?

BUBBA: Aww, hell naw man. They forgot all about that stuff. But I tell you what, if they knew all the stuff I got out of there, they'd have my hide.

THINK: I thought it was just towels, silverware, and whatever light furniture you could strap on Hillary's back.

BUBBA: Hell naw, man. Hey, we off the record?

THINK: Sure thing, Bubba.

BUBBA: You ever hear of Lincoln's gold? Got that. Got George Washington's skull too. That's gonna be worth somethin' one day.

THINK: Yeah... So how are things between you and the wife? She still pissed about the whole Lewinski thing? Has your new book reopened any old wounds?

BUBBA: Aww jeez man! You promised you weren't going to ask me about my b*tches!

THINK: Sorry, but about Hillary?

BUBBA: (misty-eyed) Ah feel her pain.

THINK: What about her?

BUBBA: Man, she don't feel my nothing no more! She won't even return my calls now that she ran for President and lost!

THINK: That's rough Bub. I, too, feel your...

BUBBA: Hey, that's my line!

THINK: Woah, sorry. What about Al?

BUBBA: Hell man, he's more boring than a Baptist in a chastity belt.  I had better times back on the pig farm in Arkansas, course (misty-eyed again) those were good days. And the way he’s been ranting on stage, man he must’ve taken lessons from Howard Dean, coz he sure didn’t get that from me!

THINK: Well, it looks like the ladies here are taking good care of you.

BUBBA: Oh yeah man, I'm as happy as a pig in sh*t. There's just one problem though.

THINK: And that is?

BUBBA: Where's the beef? I mean, these ladies are gorgeous and everything, but there all skinny-minnies, you know what I'm sayin' here? I mean, I got a hankerin' for a T-bone, and they're bringing me side salads! I need somethin' I can grab on to.

THINK: Come on, Bubba. I think I know a place. And we have a company account there.

BUBBA: I like this magazine's style. Ah really do.

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1. To make you think
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When you only tell the truth, you start earning trust, as journalists, our mission is to tell the truth.
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We want to make you laugh, chuckle, smirk, grin or smile as we try to find the upside of life in the face of all the evil around us.

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